July 18, 2012
July Something Twenty Twelve, Anytown USA
at 1:37 PM
During the previous 45 minutes, I heard a very faint knocking noise. Assuming it was a person trying to annoyingly get my attention, I let out a meager, "Hello?" Not unlike how Lionel Richie would say it. "Hello?" I said again, to no response.
Minutes had passed by without a trace of human life lurking beyond the corner. I thought maybe it was my sister, sneaking into my house and trying to be weird. I live in a weird family with weird people. It was possible, I thought.
*knock* ......... *knock* ...........
It was one of those noises that barely registers with your ears; just enough to get a reaction out of you but not enough for you to actually feel as though you should investigate. If it grew to a full-on knock or an outright banging noise, I decided, I would grab the shotgun and fire a warning shot into the ceiling and/or my face by accident. The noise remained consistently light, occasionally stopping for a few minutes before continuing again. Still, I didn't care enough to seek it out. It was still only a minor annoyance that was distracting me from my important #tweeting and computer work.
I put down my sleeve of saltine crackers. Okay, what the hell. Is there a mouse? Has a cat gone rogue? I have decided to expend the necessary energy that it would take to discover what has been mildly bothering me for the better part of an hour now (meaning, I turned my head 45 degrees to the left.) Under the wind of a ceiling fan, my hanging plastic bag of empty cans was lightly bumping against my closet door.
I miss hockey. Go to hell, July, you big turd.